Writing Again ( by Sanghamitra Nath)

Dear Friends,

I am writing again, after a long long time. The last time I wrote was 5 months back and before that, 3 Years back.

Sometimes, I wonder why I don't write as much as I used to even though I love to write so much !  Maybe, one of the reasons is that I have lost the connection that I used to have with my own self. Or that for a long long time, I have forgotten what it means to have a sense of self.

Today, some of my old Blogger friends were discussing about the lost art of writing and blogging. Their conversation has motivated me to write again. So, after a long gap, I am writing again.

Writers like me live in a highly abstract world- a world which cannot be understood by many and sometimes, if you begin to describe it, they may call you weird or strange. So, it is best to put down my thoughts in writing (to self ) rather than speaking ( to others). It is very essential for abstract people like writers to express their thoughts and in the absence of many people not understanding us, we have to get it out of our system not by trying to explain to people by speaking out but by writing out in a journal or a blogging platform. Of course, we are speaking to an audience but that is later. First, we are speaking to ourselves. We are putting ourselves in front of the world but before that, we are "coming out"of our shells in which we have been hiding for so long. This is a sign of establishing or asserting our identity.
Writers write about what is important for them.What they have known for so long. What they love. What they want. What they hope. What keeps them going. The conversations that they have with themselves. What they want to release or surrender.
And these conversations can be sometimes very long, absurd and abstract for the readers but not for the writers. For them, writing is life itself.

Anyways, I am already feeling so good for being finally able to write after a long long time. So much has happened over these years. I did not even document these incidents and events in my writing. But that is not necessary. I am not saying that analyzing or keeping record of our lives is not necessary but what is perhaps more necessary is our connection with our self even after all these years and not getting lost in the events that overpowered us.

I think I have said enough for today. I hope to keep writing in this space as frequently as possible.

Beauty and Madness

 

For a long time, I have not updated my blog. That is because I have been dealing with a lot of events in my life lately. My husband has been transferred to a new city. We will move there as soon as he finds a new home for us. Meanwhile, I have left my old city for good, with bag and baggage and right now, I am living with my parents in my childhood hometown. 


My health is also improving though there is lot left to be desired. At my parents home, I am getting enough time to take rest, eat good food and soak in the sunshine, all of which is good for my health.

  

I did lose interest in photography, writing, blogging and other such creative pursuits because of my health and also because of the adverse reactions of the strong medicines that I have been taking for a while. However, in spite of all these events, I have been thinking of beauty and seeing beauty everywhere. I do not know how this happens, but I can just “see” that. Something about life still intrigues me…the fragrance of flowers, the wild plant that grows between the creeks, the voice of  certain singers ( Linda Ronstadt , Lisa Stansfield ), their soul stirring melancholic songs, their voice hitting a certain note at a certain point of the song…and a lot of other things like the play of light and shade through the window in a room at odd hours…certain colors, like the color pale green or white and the mood created by them.

  

Beauty is beautiful indeed. To live , to feel alive as if my face has been splashed with a sudden gush of water…rain water, forcing me to come alive at this very moment..like a newborn calf that wants to run just after it comes out of its mother’s womb…it happens. 



Life gets more mysterious as time marches on. It plays tricks on us, on our senses. We fall apart sometimes but there is something that pulls us up in the midst of nowhere….it takes us by surprise…it shows us the madness that is called life. Madness and Chaos. And Beauty in the midst of it.

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Photo Description: Flowers I decorated in a brass metal urli (bowl) filled with water. All flowers are from my mom's garden.